Sleeping Paris
by Bandgirlflute
Summary: What happens when Sleeping Beauty is modernized? What would happen if Paris Hilton was Sleeping Beauty and Lindsey Lohan was the Evil Witch? Read and find out. Warning, making fun of celebrities. Oneshot


Author's Note: Hi there, I wrote this in my Intro to Theater class, we had to make a fairy tale modernized. My friends thought it was funny so I put it on here. Anyways this is Sleeping Beauty modernized. It has Paris Hilton as Sleeping Beauty and Lindsey Lohan as the evil witch. So if you like these people and do not like them being made fun of, then you probably won't like this story. Anyway here is the story, enjoy!

**Sleeping Paris**

Once upon a time, there lived these rich people who always wanted a child, their names were the Hiltons. One day Mrs. Hilton was blessed with a child, nine months later, they had a beautiful baby girl, they named her Paris. They were so excited that they threw a party for their new daughter. Everyone came to the party, Orlando Bloom, Sean Biggerstaff, Brad and Angelina, Jessica Simpson, and other people. The Hiltons told the guest the only way they could get into the party was if they brought a gift, and if they were famous. They brought toys, money, diamonds, caviar, etc. The Hiltons beamed as everyone came up to give their gifts, thanking them for coming. It was three in the morning when Paris godmothers came up to give their gifts. Christina Aguilera, one of her three godmothers, was first.

"Sweet child my gift for you is dance lessons, so when you are older you can shake your butt for everyone to see, also a hundred thousand dollars, (ten thousand wouldn't be enough for her) so you can buy skimpy cloths to go with, when you dancing." Christina said, she handed the money to her parents, who were smiling at her. Next was Britney Spears( I don't think they are friends, but couldn't think of anyone else.)

"Dear child, my gift for you is plastic surgery, just in case you are ugly when you get older, or you need to add something." She handed the gift card and went to party. Last was Nicole Richie.

"Smelly child my gift for you is . . . " She was interrupted by the door opening. There in the door way was Lindsey Lohan. She put her hand on her hip and walked up to the Hiltons. She had reached where the Hiltons were, she glared at them.

"Sorry that I'm late, I only just heard about the party, your invitation must have gone to the wrong address. That would probably explain why the wannabe is here." Lindsey said, glancing at Hillary Duff, who was dancing with Leonardo Dicaprio.

"Well actually Lindsey, we didn't really invite you." Mr. Hilton said, looking at his wife and Nicole.

Lindsey's face went hard " Well no matter, I will just go after I give my gift to the child."

"No that is ok . . . " Mrs. Hilton said, she knew that Lindsey had evil powers. ( I know that can't happen but how else will Paris die.)

"Shut up, now I will steal all of her boyfriends, and date them for myself, and to make it more dramatic, on her 16th birthday, she will press a button on a cell phone and will die." She laughed, she walked away from the Hiltons. She left the party, but not before she took Paris( the guy) with her.

"O no what shall we do?" Mrs. Hilton cried.

"I don't know, maybe we all should go shopping and figure this out, you know spending money always helps." Mr. Hilton said, he wrapped his arms around his wife.

"As much as I love spending money that I didn't earn, I think we should come up with a plan." Nicole said.

"I never thought I would say this Nicole, but I think you are right, we must come up with a plan." Mr. Hilton said.

"Well thank you, now, how can we break the spell." Nicole said, her face started to scrunch up as she thought.

"Nicole you thinking won't get us anywhere, you never had an intelligent thought before, or any thought for that matter."Mrs. Hilton said.

"I got it! Nicole, you still have your gift to give, right?" Mr. Hilton said excited.

"Yea, but what is that going to do? I don't think signing her up for a tv show will help us much here." Nicole said, her face confused.

"No, no, your gift can break the spell!" Mr. Hilton said.

"O I never thought of that!" Mr. Hilton rolled his eyes. " But I can't help you there, my powers can't break spells." The Hiltons faces fell. "But I can change it." Nicole added. The Hiltons faces lit up.

Nicole bent over the girl "Sweet child my gift for you is that when you touch the button on a cell phone, is that you will fall into a deep sleep. To wake up you will be kissed by your true love, or any guy that is hot." Now all the Hiltons could do was to wait.

To prevent that their daughter would ever die of touching a button on a cell, they never let her have one, or let anyone let her touch one. So young Paris grew up, she grew into a beautiful, ditzy blonde(no offence to any blondes). Her parents were so proud of her, the proudest moment for them was their daughters first words, "that's hot."

She became famous, her good looks, got her everywhere. She spent all of her parent's money on things that she didn't need. She bought everything, besides books, they weren't important to her. She was the most popular at her school, everyone wanted to be like her. But sadly, Paris didn't have everything. She felt empty, she really wanted a cell phone. That was one thing that she never had, all of her friends had one, but she didn't.

She would beg to her parents for them to get one for her, she even did the innocent child look, but her parents said no. Paris could not understand why her parents wouldn't let her get one. Finally her parents were so tired of telling her no, that they told her about what would happen if she got one.

"So you are telling me that I can't have a cell phone because some women wants to kill me?" The 15 year old asked.

"That is right, so you can understand why we don't want you to have one. See honey." Her mother said sweetly.

"I don't care if someone is trying to kill me, I just want a cell phone , all of my friends have one." She brushed away the thought of someone killing her as if it was like someone trying to sell her a hundred dollar necklace. "Please can't I have one, that would be so hot, now I want the new razor cell phone, it comes..."

"Paris we said no, you may think this is a game to you, but it isn't for us. For the last time, we aren't getting you as cell phone, now stop asking us." Mr. Hilton said angrily. Paris threw a tantrum, shed a few tears, and then ran to her room.

"Do you think I was to hard on her?" Mr. Hilton asked his wife.

"O honey, of course you were, now you just have to make it up to her." His wife said sweetly. The next day Paris got a new puppy, she named her Tinkerbell.

So the year went by, and Paris still didn't have a cell phone. It was now her 16th birthday, and it was going to be the biggest party ever. Everyone was coming, she was excited because her godmothers were coming, especially Nicole. Nicole told her that she was going to get her Canada because England was her favorite place.(if you didn't get that, then I am sorry)

Paris was walking down her hallway, in her pink dress, she wanted to be a princess this year for her birthday. She was walking to her room to get her tiara, she opened up her door. She walked over to her vanity where her tiara lay. She looked in the mirror and saw someone's else reflection. She turned around, Lindsey Lohan stood by her door.

"Can I call someone to help you?" Paris asked.

"No that is ok, I just wanted to give you my gift." Lindsey said, smiling at her.

"Just put it on one of the tables with the rest of the gifts." Paris said, she turned to get her crown.

"O but I can't, you see, I have to leave, and I wanted to give you the gift so I could see you opening it." Lindsey said, coming into the room.

"Who are you, I have never seen you before, I think I saw you in the magazines. Didn't you steal Mary-Kates boyfriend?" Paris asked.

"No you must have mistaken me for someone else." Lindsey said.

"Alright then, so what is my present?" Paris asked.

"It is a special gift, it is a cell phone." Lindsey said dramatically.

"O really give it to me!" Paris said excited, she ran over to Lindsey. Lindsey handed her a pink cell phone. Paris took it from her, she pressed the on button. Paris eyes rolled, her knees buckled, she fell to the floor. Lindsey stood above her, laughing in her evil laugh, she walked out of the room.

It was Nicole who found her first, Nicole ran to Paris parents to tell them what happened. Her parents came up the stairs, they saw their beautiful little girl laying on the floor, her blonde hair all over the place. Her parents cried as they saw her lying there, her father picked her up and placed her on her bed. Her father walked back to where his wife stood, he placed his arms around her. Mrs. Hilton sobbed into his shirt.

"How did this happen?" Mr. Hilton asked.

"I think that somehow Lindsey snuck into your house and gave her the phone." Nicole answered.

Mr. Hilton raised his eyebrow. "Maybe you are right, what do we do now?"

" Maybe we should go and have some cake." Nicole offered.

"No, I mean what do we do about Paris? What can we do to wake her up?" Mr. Hilton asked.

"O well, the spell said that her true love would wake her up by a kiss, or if the guy was hot." Nicole said.

"No boy is going to kiss my daughter." Mr. Hilton said, he didn't want his daughter kissing anyone.

"O yes she will." Mrs. Hilton said, looking up to glare at her husband.

"Fine," He walked out of the room, but not before he muttered to himself, "Why couldn't a text have woken her up, why did it have to be a boy?"

"Come on, there is nothing more that you can do for her." Nicole said, she pulled Mrs. Hilton out of the room.

The party down stairs was still going on, everyone was waiting for Paris to come down stairs. A handsome young boy was there, waiting to see Paris, his name was Joe Francio. He had been nervous to meet her, and to keep him occupied he had drank ten glasses of Mountain Dew, so you could guess what would happen. He had to go to the bathroom bad, he ran up the stairs, almost running over Mr. Hilton. He looked everywhere for the bathroom, finally he found it. Fifteen minutes later he came out of the bathroom. He looked around, trying to remember where the stairs were. He walked down the hallway, looking for the stairs. He past an open door, he looked into the room. There lying on the bed someone was sleeping. Joe went into the room, trying to see who this person was.

Joe came right up to Paris's bed, he thought she was very hot. Her blonde hair covered her pillow, her red lips were as red as a rose. He wanted to see what those lips felt like. He bent over and kissed Paris. As he straightened up, he saw Paris open her eyes.

Long story short, Paris and Joe went down to the party, her parents screamed and ran to hug her. Lindsey Lohan was found in the Hiltons bedroom, trying to steal things. So the people in the white coats came and took her to an anorexic place. Nicole became even more famous, she started her own tv show. And Paris and Joe lived happily ever after, until she broke up with him, but that is a different story.

The End


End file.
